As photographers and cinematographers, we see a lot of toasts. Some good, some bad. We have lost touch with how to speak publicly and to give a toast. Here are the do’s and don’ts to give a toast.
1- Structure
Your toast should look something like this:
- Introduce who you are and how you are connected to the Bride or Groom.
- Tell a funny story.
- Share a touching moment. Not to personal or anything embarrassing, but something which shows the Bride or Groom’s good nature.
- Congratulate them. Duh!
- Ask guests to raise their glasses. “Cheers”
2- Write your toast out.
Grab that old pen and paper and physically write your toast. Ideally, you should do this at least a week before you have to give your toast. There are a few things not to do here. Don’t type it on your phone or computer. This may seem like the easiest way to get your speech down, and it is great for a quick note, but it isn’t for delivering a great toast. There is science to show that physically writing (not typing) helps the brain remember something better.
3- Proof read it.
That fun joke about the groom from high-school with his ex-girlfriend; DON’T. It is good to make some jokes, but ask yourself these couple of questions:
- Is it funny (not just to you but others)? Embarrassing is good usually. Would have needed to have been there for it to be funny?
- Does it hurt the Bride or Groom’s character? They should laugh at the story you are telling, not hang their head in shame.
4- Memorize it.
We have lost the art of memorizing pieces of text. It isn’t as difficult as it sounds. The ancient orators used to visualize walking into a house with different parts of their speech assigned to different parts of the building. While a little distant for us, the plan is still pretty simple. We meet people, then we laugh with them, then we cry with them, then we celebrate with them. Do that with your toast: Meet, Laugh, Cry, Celebrate.
And practice. After you think you have practiced it, practice it some more. Say your speech while you are riding in the car. Take at least a couple weeks to practice. The guest of honor chose you to be at their special event with you by their side, take the extra few minutes to be the person they want you to be.
5- Never do these!
Now that you know what to do, these are the things to absolutely avoid. Not only do you risk making yourself look bad (or like a complete a-hole), but you also risk alienating the family and friends. And for heaven’s sake, you are sure to have the cinema or photography company cursing your name for hours.
- Read your speech from your phone. At least take the time to copy it to an index card.
- Look at your cards the whole time you are reading it.
- Hold the microphone right next to your lips. The DJ will make it louder if it needs to be.
- Put down the microphone. No, you can’t yell loud enough and clear enough for everyone to hear.
- Drink too much before speaking. Partying is fine and good, Jesus turned 40 gallons of water into wine, and it was “the good stuff,” drunken slurring, rambling, speash paternses are not.
- Speak too long. Say it in less than 5 minutes. The guests will thank you.
These are some of the best tips we can give you for making a toast that people will enjoy. If your aim is to be unforgettable, give the groom a brand new Maserati and they will never forget it.
Did we cover all the bases? Let us know what you think in the comments below.